There's Always a Tranny

I visited my mom recently and went to church with her, as is expected. I can go through the prayers by rote and don't much have to pay attention...but I certainly can people-watch while the hour goes mind-numbingly by. One person I can't keep my eyes off of...is a tranny. I think.

Remember "Tootsie" and "Mrs. Doubtfire" and how Dustin Hoffman make really unconvincing women? Not behavior-wise, but LOOK-wise. Middle-aged, house frau-ish and just, well, something ain't right about them? This woman fits every single category: Too much make-up. Not very attractive. Hair looks like a wig. High-collars. Lots of jewelry. Low voice. Mom's tranny happens to have a low voice (I overheard her) and never sings along with the hymns. She's not very tall, and her hands and feet aren't large, but other than that - I'm certain she's got a secret.

I've been to church with the boyfriend's family a few times now...and THEY have a tranny, too!! She hands out programs before service. She's got all of the above PLUS the height, large hands and feet. ...and she's blonde. Which reminds me of the Flight of the Conchords song, "Leggy Blonde," which is about a REAL woman, but still...worth a listen: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7syyywL9JuM