Share the Road??

I used to work for a cycling enthusiast. For six years I felt compelled to quench my absolute loathe and disgust for cyclists. That particular enthusiast hasn’t been my boss now for over a year, so I think it’s safe to let the bile seep out.

Who. The hell. Do you think you are, cyclists?? I see you on your sweet bike, in your sweet outfit that cost umpteen hundreds of dollars. I see you ahead of me, very much in my lane, in fact, you’re in the middle of it. Awesome. This is me, passing you, in my car. The car licensed to drive on the road, in an appropriate lane, in a safe manner. I obey the rules of the road, albeit on occasion I fail to follow the speed limit. Trust me, I’m a careful driver, and I see you. I’ve passed you now, and you’re in my rear-view mirror. Stay back there.

Wait. Don’t stay back there. Go to a park. Go to a cycling trail. You know, the kinds of trails crafted especially for you. There’s Stone Mountain Park. There’s the Silver Comet. That’s just two. There are many more, and I can even tell you how to get there. Why in god’s name must you ride on the same road as cars? There’s exhaust, there’s traffic lights, there’s all sorts of hazards, let alone…you. What’s fun in any way about behaving like a car when you can’t go anywhere near as fast as a car, and every car on the road HATES you? Get out of my way. Thank you.